Ghost Troop Home Page April Fools Part 3

September 17, 1045, email to David Beasley, Atlanta Journal Constitution

Hey, David, it's Captain May. I'm the guy who sent you the unpublishable op-eds a month or so ago. I think the truth about Jessica, Baghdad, the use of black ops by the commander in chief and all made y'all a little nervous, so how about something a lot less risky. I wrote an analysis for the Cringing Houston Chronicle a month ago. It did nothing more than use the relevant op-eds I'd already published with the Chronicle to paint the strategic picture for folks who don't understand it yet. I saw Ms. Tucker sounding semi-aggressive Friday, so I figure the Bush bullshit is falling apart. Anyone want to pretend to be a heroic newspaper?

Captain May

September 19, 0800, email to Cynthia Tucker, Atlanta Journal Constitution

I've tried for two months to bring the most important story in America to your attention. I really thought y'all were going to do your jobs when your cartoonists went and bragged about how brave Cynthia was on CNN (was it July 21 or 22?) Anyhow, Bush popped the Hussein boys, then crawled off to Crawford, and y'all sat on the truth, even though it was the soldiers from your home post, Ft. Stewart, who did the bleeding and were shamed by your silence. Oh well, I know you're all part of the same club. That's why my book is going to do so well. Below are the chapters you folks have earned, and below that are the essays that should have had you moving in July -- had you not already been involved in an illegal cover-up since April. Call if you want to talk, [telephone number omitted by Editor]. I'm all for forgiveness when someone acts contrite. Keep standing on the teetering foundation of "journalistic integrity" and the fall will be all the harder.

Captain May

Ghost Troop Home Page April Fools Part 3