Ghost Troop Home Page April Fools Part 3

September 4, email to Wolf Blitzer, CNN

Bad dog, Wolf! Sit! Stay!

Wolf, what the hell is wrong with you? I just saw some propaganda footage running on your network. Yep, and you’re my proof. The SecDef is meeting with Brenner, and the helicopter that took him to the meeting is circling Baghdad. Quit showing the damn helicopter cam shot and trying to think of ways to imply that the SecDef is on board. Bull chips! You’re cutting into the copter cam with live feeds of the SecDef pouring himself a drink while he sits down with Brenner. (By the way, good job by the boys in Iraq to teach folks not to sit with the soles of their feet off the ground…)

Dammit, Wolf, that man has no more guts than you do, and he ain’t circling Baghdad in a chopper. That’s just warmed up bullshit from the Bushling’s Mayday jet ride, which is nothing but warmed up bullshit from Leni Reifenstal’s Triumph of the Will. Yep, Hitler and the queen of propaganda did everything y’all are thinking about doing. Go get the real shit and learn your business! Don’t hang your head though, boy, ‘cause even Leni was a rip-off artist; the title of her movie was a rip-off from Nietzsche.

Jesus, why am I trying to talk intelligence to you? Must be losing it, or maybe I’m just giddy at the prospect of seeing you media boys before Congress pretty soon.

Cease and desist from trying to prop up the SecDef’s image, and the same goes for the prez. You’ve gotten us into inestimable trouble by covering up the reality of Bush’s leadership at the Baghdad Airport. You gave him a free ride, and now look what he’s doing. Here, the op-ed will say it. Guess who ran it. After the op-ed I’ll attach my black list and my honor roll. Guess which one you’re getting close to.

Captain May

Ghost Troop Home Page April Fools Part 3