Ghost Troop Home Page April Fools Part 1
Dear Will (and John and David, I assume), I think
your dad has rued the day he taught me to sharpen my pen ever since I sent him
a Chronicle essay arguing for the artistic merit of hip hop music (which I was
then using to teach English). Well, I've
been off the deep end again as of late, writing gloomy geopolitical prognoses
because of the war in
Not that I have inherent qualms about war. Heavens (or should I say Hell), I’ve volunteered for every one in my time. I tried to get back into the service after 911, but they said I was too violent (two misdemeanors, both assaults) to go and kill folks for my country. Well, I was always better at intelligence and writing anyhow, so I’ve decided to save my own hide and watch the Crackers and Coloreds fighting in the desert – isn’t that the way of the brave souls who have urged the war?
There is one great difference between me and most of
my fellow Americans: I know I am a
fool. On April Fools day I made it
public by sending my editor a piece opposing the war on military grounds. Everyone
else knew that victory was a done deal.
My editor stuck the piece in on April 3 after saying he had to use it
before we got to
On April 4 (April 5 in
I believe that the Danford
family is chock full of intellect, and I earnestly ask for help in ridding
myself of this Socratic delusion that I’m really the wisest man around because
I alone realize that I’m a fool, while everyone else thinks they’re not. Just try to find out what happened in
I’m writing a book about what I figured out and what I did about it. The working title is “The April Fool.” I hope I will still look foolish when the censors let the story out.
I’ve also enclosed my analysis of the military situation to date. General Wesley Clark has caught up to some of my predictions of April. He is three months late, but that’s pretty good for a general officer and great (as the commander in chief is proving) for a civilian.
David, a last word.
I’m very proud to know two
The other cadet I know (though it’s been years since
we saw each other) is you, and I smiled wide when your dad told me you had
applied and been accepted to
Will, it was a pleasure bantering with you. Congratulations on your graduation. You sound so much like John – in voice and ideas – that at moments I forgot with whom I was talking, and smiled at memories of the days when I was your age and arguing with him. Friendship is more important than politics, after all, and anyone who tells you different is either a fickle friend or a fanatic.
My affectionate regards to all, Captain May
PS: Will, can all that trash talk about how the commander in chief needs to have the power to order “black operations” and assassinations and such. You’re going to jinx me!