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Fools Part 3
OK, OK, I'll move Ghost Troop, 3/7 Cavalry into position to support you, but salute my command, general, because we’re saluting you. It's time to bring out the truth about the Pvt. Jessica / Battle of Baghdad debacle. That will launch your campaign for the presidency, right? OK, our comrades are still dying in the desert and I know that you know how dire things are becoming, and if you've read any of my writing, you know that I know.
Like you, I have put my military career on the line
for my convictions before. In my case I
was the public affairs officer of the 75th Reserve Division (Exercise). In 1991, I earned my civic spurs by breaking
up a chapter of the Southside Crips who were
targeting my
In 1994, I turned the clout into Department of the Army funding for a drug demand reduction program that actually seemed to make sense – a Houston-based version of Ft. Sam Houston's La Salida (Spanish for "The way out"), a ropes/adventure course for the kind of urban kids I taught then and still love now, just like I loved my soldiers before them. The general staff horned in on the funds for the programs, then spent it on weekend warrior get-togethers for their buddies to chase tail and down drinks.
I took Major General Claude J. Roberts, my then-commander, to a Congressional Investigation for his turpitude, and he wrote me a general letter of reprimand for the first thing he could find (sign-in peccadilloes) to torpedo my career.
I recall two things with honor:
I charged the general in his office and raged at him for half an hour. It wasn’t as hard as you’d think: He was more afraid of losing his two stars because he was wrong than I was afraid of losing my two bars because I was right. It’s a martial arts concept that I’m sure you understand: a wise warrior wins his battle before it’s fought. The second is that I put that rascal, who was about to be USARC Commander, at the top of the Houston NBC affiliate's news broadcasts for a solid week. He was relieved of command of the division shortly after my banishment.
I believe that I have made my sacrifices to do my
duty, and I am prepared to do so as I write.
I will always be prepared to do so, for I joined the Army when I was
seventeen, and the Army has been my Harvard and my
When the general declares war for the Constitution (which he will do when he announces his candidacy), I promise top-end fire support with infoartillery. We are allies, for we attack the same enemy: tyranny. I am not OPCON, though, so do not take my support for granted.
Good luck, general.
Captain May
PS: My professional rate is $150 an hour as a ghostwriter. Keep the money you’d spend on me and buy yourself some ads, because I’m not willing to help you as a professional, I’m prepared to help you as a comrade.